Your spouse's affair: your anger and what not to say to your kids

Rabbie Sherre Hirsch, Rabbi & Relationship Expert, shares advice for parents on handling your anger and what not to tell your kids after a spouse's affair
Expert Advice On What Not To Tell Your Kids About Your Spouse's Affair
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Your spouse's affair: your anger and what not to say to your kids

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This is so confusing and so messy. Your partner's had an affair. Do you tell your kids? Do you not tell your kids? So, the first thing you've got to do, is you've got to recognize for yourself, that a partner can be a lousy spouse, but a great parent, and you have to make that distinction for your children. It's a hard one to make when you're so angry, and all you want to do is strangle that person. Don't. Your feelings will pass. How you feel in this moment is not necessarily how you're going to feel tomorrow. But if you communicated it with all that urgency, and passion, and anger to your children, they'll hold on to it forever. Give them what they can can hear. "We made a mistake. My partner make a mistake, but that does not mean they're a terrible person, and that does not mean that our family is over. We're figuring it out." To give your children the answer, "I don't know. We're figuring it out." is a very powerful response, and it lets them know that they don't have to have it figured out either.

Rabbie Sherre Hirsch, Rabbi & Relationship Expert, shares advice for parents on handling your anger and what not to tell your kids after a spouse's affair

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Rabbi Sherre Hirsch

Rabbi & Relationship Expert

Rabbi Sherre Hirsch is a mother of four, author, speaker, TV personality, teacher and the spiritual life consultant for Canyon Ranch.  After eight years at Sinai Temple in Los Angeles, she stepped out from behind the formal podium to share her message in all kinds of pulpits from The Today Show to a small baptist church in Alabama.  She published her first book, We Plan, God Laughs: What to Do When Life Hits You Over the Head in 2008; her second book will be published in early 2013. Rabbi Hirsch spends her free time practicing yoga, baking brownies and playing freeze dance with her husband and children.

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