Are parents of only-children more personally fulfilled?

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Are parents of only-children more personally fulfilled?

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We have lost site of fulfillment for parents. I really believe that. Our culture has been so consumed with what it means to be a perfect parent, which we associate with constant sacrifice, sometimes even I think we all know sanctimonious sacrifice. And I think it is so important for parents to have some freedom in their lives and to be able to focus on themselves, to be able to focus on their romantic relationship as a marriage or as a cohabitating relationship, to be able to focus on adult friendships, to be able to focus on fulfilling work without guilt, and to be able to focus on pleasures outside of work without guilt, to be able to travel, to be able to go to a rock show or read a novel, all the things that I liked to do before I became a mother I still want to do. And I have found for me that it is easier to do that when you have one child and that that brings a fulfilled life into my parenting, which is then really good for my kid. And it is really good for my larger family. So I think that we have sold ourselves out in some ways by focusing so obsessively on parenting and that whether you have one children or more children to just give yourself the permission to do what some people might think is selfish. You mean actually think about ourselves can actually be a pretty selfless act because I think it makes us better parents.

See Lauren Sandler, MA's video on Are parents of only-children more personally fulfilled?...

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Lauren Sandler, MA

Journalist & Author

Lauren Sandler is the author of One and Only: The Freedom of Having an Only Child and the Joy of Being One, and a journalist who writes on cultural politics and gender issues for publications like Time, The New York Times, and Slate. And she’s as an only child and the mother of one herself. 

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