Finding out what a friend needs after a tragedy

Learn about: Finding out what a friend needs after a tragedy from Kim Hamer,...
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Finding out what a friend needs after a tragedy

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After a loss, tragedy or crises it’s often difficult to figure out what a family or your friend may need. So the first thing you’re going to do, you’re going to ask them, “What is it that you need me to do for you?” Oftentimes, they will have some inkling of what they need, whether immediately – pay a bill – or whether long term – just come over every Thursday night. The second thing you can do is sit back and watch and see what has been done already. And then do something that hasn’t been taken care of. One of the greatest things you can do is become the project manager. You become the person who figures out what needs to be done and fills in the spaces of who can do it and when. The person in crises is completely incapable of managing that. And they really need one, two or three people who are going to take on this job and take care of them. In essence, service gate keeper. So those are three ideas on how you can figure out what a person needs.

Learn about: Finding out what a friend needs after a tragedy from Kim Hamer,...

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Kim Hamer

100 Acts of Love: A Girlfriend's Guide to Loving A Friend Through Cancer or Loss

Kim Hamer is the author of 100 Acts of Love: A Girlfriend's Guide to Loving Your Friend through Cancer or Loss, a modern, essential how-to guide offering tips on what to say (and NOT to say), and specific ways to support and love a friend, co-worker or family member who is coping with cancer, loss or any crisis.

Kim Hamer became a widow after her 44-year old husband lost his life to cancer. Their children were 12, 9 and 7 at the time. Before and after her husband’s death, friends and supporters came up with unique, creative and simple ways to help her family. She called them “acts of love” because it’s what they felt like.

Her book is a fun, straightforward compilation of many of those acts. The mission of “100 Acts of Love” is to help everyone understand and embrace their importance in the lives of their friend in crisis and to provide the tools and courage needed to support them in a truly meaningful and helpful way.

More Parenting Videos from Kim Hamer >
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