There are many reasons why a woman may decide to put her child up for adoption. Some women may find the weight of an unexpected pregnancy to be daunting while others may look at adoption as a viable alternative to abortion. Whatever the reasoning behind the decision to do so, adoption still remains a way for mothers to ensure that their child will be growing up in a good and nurturing home.
The adoption process can be emotional for the birth mother. Historically birth mothers tended to be young women who were first-time moms and because of a surprise pregnancy decided to give their child up for adoption. Stephen Ravel, adoption attorney, explains this is no longer the case. Women who decide to adopt can be first or second-time moms. They may already have children but because they lack the financial and familial support, they chose to give their child to a loving family to avoid future burden to them and the children they already have. As Ravel points out, the contemporary birth mother may have a more realistic vision as to what it takes to raise a child and makes the decision to adopt as a way to ensure that everyone has access to a good life.
A birth mom can go through an agency, which can help her with every step of the adoption process or can work with a lawyer, who represents the adoptive family. Giving a child up for adoption means that as a birth mom, you can make the choice between what type of adoption you want. Dr. Jennifer Bliss, Counseling Director of Independent Adoption Center, explains the different types of adoptions. A birth mom can choose a closed adoption, which means that there is no exchange of information between the birth mother and the adopted family. A semi-open adoption means that the agency acts as a liaison and provides the birth mother with updates of her child throughout the years. An open adoption means that the birth mother has direct contact with the child and the adoptive family. The open adoption can give the birth mother a means to make sure that the child knows the story of their adoption and to have contact with the child as they grow into adulthood.
As the birth mother, you don’t need to worry that by going through with an adoption that you are cutting off all ties to your child. An open adoption allows you to stay in contact with them throughout their lives. Dr. Guylaine Hubbard-Brosmer, adoption expert, explains her experience with open adoption allowed her and her husband to raise their adoptive children with love from both families. Their adoptive children have a relationship with their birth mother’s family, including their other siblings and their birth grandmother. Though adoption can bring forth a myriad of emotions, birth mothers have options available to them to ensure that their child will have a good life.