KidsInTheHouse the Ultimate Parenting Resource
Kids in the House Tour

How do I get my 16 yr. old dauther pay more attention, do chores, and clean up?

Posted November 30, 2014 - 6:50am

 

7 posts / 0 new
Last post

JordanRowley

Hey! Having a teenage daughter myself, I know exactly where you are coming from! When she turned 15 it was as if there was a switch and she became really moody and hard to deal with. My first piece of advice is to be patient. Teenagers tend to like to push buttons and see how far they can go. So while being patient make sure they know the rules and the consequences for not doing those things. Hold your ground when they don't listen to you and they will gain grater respect for you. Hope this helps and I put below a video to some great advice from Josh Shipp about it :)


Frugal Minded M...

Follow up to this, what would be the best consequences for a 16 year old who doesn't listen.  I understand they are trying to push boundarie, but what to do when there is utter revolt.


sunnykathleen

I wonder the same thing as a single parent. So far my daughter and son follow along with what I expect of them in chores and contributing financially when they can. If they ever refused to follow through I wouldn't know the exact consequences (taking away priveleges and electronics) but what would their next move be I wonder?


sunnykathleen

I wonder the same thing as a single parent. So far my daughter and son follow along with what I expect of them in chores and contributing financially when they can. If they ever refused to follow through I wouldn't know the exact consequences (taking away priveleges and electronics) but what would their next move be I wonder?


Caeleyn

What's worked for me is associating doing certain things ~ tidying her room, keeping the floor swept, loading the dishwasher ~ with the things she wants to do. My rule is that she can't go to a friend's house or doesn't get to drive if she doesn't do what's expected of her. 

Most of the time it works. If I need a "Plan B", I just disable her phone. She's refused to give her phone up in the past, I refuse to get into a struggle with her; now I only have to log onto Verizon's Family Base dashboard and shut it down from there. 

Our situation was a bit more difficult because her father alienated her from me and he was totally permissive as a parent. It's hard work to reestablish boundaries after that; we still have trouble sometimes. 

It's a matter of finding out your daughter's "currency" and using that as leverage. 

Hope this helps! 

Kind Regards,

Carol

 


Frugal Minded M...

I do similar things with my kids.  Get your jobs done and then you can do what you would like.