Parenting a teen

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Parenting a teen

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How do keep the boundaries between being a confidante and a parent with your teen is; number one, you've got to be able to listen to them. You can't just keep telling them what to do and what hasn't been done yet. If you get that, you start to get conditioning, and over time, they see you and go right on the defensive. They think you are telling them and approaching them telling them what they need to do. Sit back and listen. I think, also, that parents need to understand that your kid needs a parent, not a friend. They have plenty of friends. If they don't have friends, they still need you as a parent; which means they still need that accountability. When you hold your teen accountable, it actually makes them feel contained and safe if there is some structure there. If they get to high on the hierarchy, it makes them feel anxious because you've lead them your whole life. I think it's important that parents fight for time with their teen. As they get older, they don't want that time and you'll start to see a rift in the relationship of communication lines. What parents need to really do is fight for time with their kids. Every kid doesn't want to, but needs to have that relationship with their parent. As parents, think about it; if you had a good childhood, bad childhood, whether your parents are dead or alive, there is a part of you that needs your parents in your life right now. It's like that times 100 for your teen right now. It's not convenient, but it's a big need.

Watch Video: Parenting a teen by Jerry Weichman, PhD, ...

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Jerry Weichman, PhD

Clinical Psychologist

Dr. Jerry Weichman is a licensed psychologist and adolescent specialist as well as an author, speaker and parenting expert. His clinical practice at Hoag Hospital's Neurosciences Institute in Newport Beach, California provides a window on contemporary teen and pre-teen behavior.

“Dr. Jerry” as his adolescent patients call him, is a young PhD who really relates to teens, speaks their lingo and has felt their pain. Author of the teen survival guide, How to Deal, and noted media expert on teen issues, Dr. Jerry is focused on helping teens cope with parents, teachers, friends and academic pressure, communicating with them in a way they understand to help successfully navigate the dramas and pressures of adolescence.

Dr. Jerry's popular speeches, lectures and seminars have presented assemblies of students, teachers, parents and administrators with practical approaches on how today’s teens can overcome the trials and tribulations of growing up, from coping with bullying to meeting parental academic expectations to walking away from drugs and other self-destructive behaviors. Jerry also sits on the board of directors for the Bullying Prevention Initiative of California and just recently sat on an expert panel for a screening of the documentary Bully.

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