Preferring mommy

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Preferring mommy

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One of the most painful things that you will experience as a father -- I am saying, will experience because it's going to happen. You might come walking in a room and you've just come from long day or work, and you want to do nothing more than play with your child. Your child runs out of the room screaming for mommy. That really, really hurts. You are there. You are the dad. You want to be an equal player. What do you do about that? You have to think about what's happening from a child's perspective. If the mom is the one spending more time, it is going to be natural for the child to want the mom for some issues. That's very important to keep track of. It is also important to keep track of what is going on from the perspective of your partner. How is she reacting to this kind of behavior? She is somebody that you need to bring into the discussion about how much this hurts. Things that you can talk to about and she can talk to the child. One of them is talk me up a little bit. If something happens, say "Daddy is really good at that." To get you back into the discussions. I think the most important thing is to wait, because at some point soon, the situation will be reversed and the child is going to be running to you. Things do tend to even out, but it is going to be really important to support each other when it happens.

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Armin Brott

Dad, Author & Radio Host

A former Marine, Armin Brott has devoted the last 15 years to providing men with the tools, support, and knowledge to help them become the fathers they want to be—and their families need them to be. His seven critically acclaimed books for fathers have sold well over a million copies. Titles include The Expectant Father: Facts, Tips, and Advice for Dads-to-Be and The New Father: A Dad’s Guide to the First Year. He has written on fatherhood for hundreds of newspapers and magazines and is a frequent guest on such television programs as the Today Show. He also writes a nationally syndicated newspaper column (Ask Mr. Dad), and hosts a syndicated radio show (Positive Parenting). He lives with his family in Oakland, California.

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